- And upon the most auspicious of holidays, I would like to announce the launch of my preliminary world domination strategy. Introducing, the !! 𝗘𝗚𝗚𝗦𝗢𝗨𝗟𝗟 𝟮.𝟬 © !! Lovingly crafted with 𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙡𝙤𝙪𝙨 𝙚𝙭𝙩𝙧𝙖-𝙙𝙞𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙡 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 and unsustainably sourced vicuña wool, these eggs will fill that hole in your life that you never even knew existed. The burden of free will shall be oh so benevolently plucked from your mortal coil, as your husk of a body is set to serve the ruinous powers of the one true god.

Worried about batteries? Don't sweat it, each egg is powered with a miniaturized Void Cell which allows for eternal, maintenance-free operation which will continue to function far beyond the point where your bones are reduced to ashes. Prolonged exposure to Void energies have been proven to induce uncanny & wildly unpredictable physical symptoms, losing your sense of self whilst your soul is hallowed out in the name of evil is all part of the experience. The 'Agency Against Malevolent Originals' (AAMO), nor its subsidiary 'Ploys R Us' are legally, morally, physically or metaphysically responsible for any crimes committed against local, state, federal, or faith-based laws, regulations and institutions.

Pre-Orders for the Eggs will go live upon the long-awaited release of '𝗠𝗔𝗫𝗜𝗙𝗜𝗖𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡 𝟯: 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑭𝑰𝑵𝑨𝑳 𝑴𝑨𝑿𝑰𝑴 ©' set to hit theaters on 𝗤𝟰 𝟯𝟬𝟬𝟬 !!